Disarmed in your own home?

Oh so many responses to the OP.

Lucky me everyone in my neighborhood shoots and carries.

if there was a tool (The guy) that did this at my house, well suck it up buttercup, *insert a few derogatory terms about him being a sissy lala* and there’s the door go ahead and leave.
 
I would have politely told him my house my rules, don’t like it hit the highway. Doesn’t sound like he’s a friend anyway.
My house is my last bastion of sanity, it’s the last place I have left to be a free.

Not gonna let somebody come in to my house and tell me how to live my life, just not gonna happen.
I understand the dynamic of friends of spouses etc. but still, you don’t like it go buy your own pool and set the rules around it.
 
I like that you keep the peace at the time. Going forward I would have you wife talk to his, that weapons are part of your families life.
I'm a Mandalorian... Weapons are part of my religion...
 
I think you handled it correctly in the moment, for the sake of your family. But I would probably have a conversation with him very soon to discuss the event.

I would let him know that you choose to carry a gun for the safety of your family, do so legally and responsibly, and understand that he disagrees with that. You’re both adults, husbands, fathers, and make decisions based on what you think is best. There’s nothing wrong with disagreeing, but making demands and an ultimatum like that in front of everyone was pretty distasteful and disrespectful. Add from there as you please, but I would likely tell him that he and his family are more than welcome at your home but that he should expect that you’ll be legally and responsibly carrying, and that all firearms are 100% safely secured in your home be it in a safe or on your person. Feel free to address the scenario of you going over their house if needed.
 
We also have a swimming pool...

There is a married couple, down the road, that my wife and I have been friends with for 3 years... They have two daughters the same age as mine, and the 4 girls are best friends.

We have the other family over almost every weekend, and we all get along very well. BUT, USUALLY, THE HUSBAND DOESN'T COME OVER.

Usually, it's just me, my wife, the other wife, and 4 little girls...

That there says you are a good Dad and thought about your kids and in that instance I think you chose best for all the kids ... and even your wife. Let the dickhead have his little tantrum ... and next time soyboy is coming over remember to slip the Sticky IWB and carry on.
 
Y'all gotta put these kind of threads where they belong, Tortuga, so's I can respond without restraint!


1. You did as Billy said, minor mistake in the moment. Nothing serious.

2. I'm conflicted regarding the continued friendship between the kids.
- If he's the controlling asshole I suspect he is, he'll make sure neither the kids or the wives will be together much longer.
- Hopefully he's a puss and the wife puts him in his place.

3. He's not allowed back, not unless it's to apologise. His wife and kids, yes as long as there's no muttering under their breath about where daddy is.

Above all- you mentioned your Mrs thanked you for not being an ass. Is she not on board with the rules you want for your house? Just asking for clarification, not arguing. The two of you must be (if you're not already) on the same page 100%.
If not, discussion is needed.
Is she willing to sacrifice a possible friendship if the others want to force their will upon your family?

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I honestly hesitate to write this. I think I already know where you all are going to stand...

But, have you ever disarmed, in your own home, to keep the peace?

My wife and I have have two young girls. They know about gun safety, and at this point, know not to touch any guns. They are 8 and 6. I haven't taught them to shoot yet, but they have held lots of my unloaded guns and I keep reminding them about the gun safety rules.

We also have a swimming pool...

There is a married couple, down the road, that my wife and I have been friends with for 3 years... They have two daughters the same age as mine, and the 4 girls are best friends.

We have the other family over almost every weekend, and we all get along very well. BUT, USUALLY, THE HUSBAND DOESN'T COME OVER.

Usually, it's just me, my wife, the other wife, and 4 little girls...

On Friday ( 2 days ago), the wife came over with her two daughters and we all had fun watching the 4 girls swim... A couple hours later, the dad came over. I offered him a beer, but he said that he doesn't drink.

I sat near him (by the pool) and started a conversation while our 4 kids swam in the pool. He cut me off, in mid sentence, and said, "IS THAT A WEAPON? "

I said, "Huh?"

He pointed at the Sig P365xl printing in my cargo pocket and yelled, "IS THAT A WEAPON? I DON'T WANT THAT AROUND MY CHILDREN! PUT IT AWAY OR WE ARE LEAVING! "

There is a part of me that thinks I should have stood my ground and told him to gtfo... But, I walked into my house and disarmed...

I came back outside and everything went back to normal. We continued talking. He said, "Thank You. "

I just can't stop thinking that I should have stood my ground.

Later, I told my wife what happened... She knows I carry 24/7 365... She thanked me for not being an ass and ruining our kids freindship...

I'd like to hear what yall think...

I feel like a sissy for disarming, but I also feel glad that the kids can still be friends...

I guess I'm getting old and cranky, but I likely would have told him to not let the gate hit him on the ass on the way out. Especially the way it sounds like he was demanding, not asking.

Considering that you carry , are you sure the kids will ever be allowed over again anyway? Now you will probably be expected to adjust your way of doing things in your own home as a condition of their "friendship" if they are. Tough spot for you and I hope they weren't just friends because you have a pool. I hope it works out well for the kids. Dude sounds like a dickish ManKaren. Don't feel like a sissy, you were considering your kids. Do what you gotta do.

When I am a guest in somebodies home, I respect their way of doing things. Mrs. had a friend that is an anti. I respected that and didn't carry into her home. So far she's the only one, and since Mrs. passed away I doubt I'll ever have to consider her feelings again. Everyone whose home I would visit knows I carry 24/7/365 at least one, usually two and no one has mentioned being uncomfortable about it. I'm at my kitchen table right now with a J frame in my pocket in a sticky and an XDs IWB.
 
Y'all gotta put these kind of threads where they belong, Tortuga, so's I can respond without restraint!


1. You did as Billy said, minor mistake in the moment. Nothing serious.

2. I'm conflicted regarding the continued friendship between the kids.
- If he's the controlling asshole I suspect he is, he'll make sure neither the kids or the wives will be together much longer.
- Hopefully he's a puss and the wife puts him in his place.

3. He's not allowed back, not unless it's to apologise. His wife and kids, yes as long as there's no muttering under their breath about where daddy is.

Above all- you mentioned your Mrs thanked you for not being an ass. Is she not on board with the rules you want for your house? Just asking for clarification, not arguing. The two of you must be (if you're not already) on the same page 100%.
If not, discussion is needed.
Is she willing to sacrifice a possible friendship if the others want to force their will upon your family?

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My wife and I both have a Chp. I carry 24/7 365... She never carries. But she's always with me and regularly tells me she feels safer because I'm always armed.

She knows how strongly I follow the 2A. We sold a house, moved 2500 miles, and bought land in NC for one reason... To leave California and come to a gun friendly state.
 
The downside to handling this the way I previously suggested is this.....He got away with it...He gave You an ultimatum in Your house. This old boy now thinks he is the cock of the walk. No telling how many times he retells this to his Pussy Pals.
With that in mind....have that talk I earlier suggested with him sooner than later.
When you do....be prepard...he thinks he is way more important than he is at this point. Do Not Hesitate.
 
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Should have put the comeback on him with the question ‘You mean to tell me my wife and children have been in your house and all you have is a damn broomstick for protection’. Don’t let these supposed adults have their rule and for certain not in your home. Once I got my blood pressure down I would have shown him the door then told his wife my reason and invited her and children back anytime they chose to but to not bring the idiot back with them. Yes, idiots should suffer.
 
My wife and I both have a Chp. I carry 24/7 365... She never carries. But she's always with me and regularly tells me she feels safer because I'm always armed.

She knows how strongly I follow the 2A. We sold a house, moved 2500 miles, and bought land in NC for one reason... To leave California and come to a gun friendly state.
Very good-
I sincerely hope that you and your family won't have any further trouble from this encounter.
Perhaps it's best to look for better friends for the kids.



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I hate that happened. There’s a lot of angles for sure but I would of made sure he knew he was not going to tell me how to run my house. It would’ve been different if you had a firearm laying around accessible to the children. He now knows he can come over and run the show in your house. If he comes back I’d make sure he knew who the boss was and I would make sure and talk to your wife about it so she’s not blindsided when he blows his liberal gasket and goes home in a tizzy.


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Final word from me-
I guess it's okay this is in open forum, as it forced me to use my words carefully and not my usual profanity-laced guttural ranting about what the guy could do with a cactus, his mother-in-law and an axle from a duece and a half.

[emoji16]

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In a low voice, "My family and I are safer with the gun in my pocket. I believe I'll keep it there." I generally keep things pretty well concealed from most of my neighbors, not because I care what they think, but because (as you have observed) guns tend to make some people overreact, some irrationally so. Don't need the aggravation.
 
Sounds like you did well to defuse the situation and keep everything calm. However, might not be the best friends to have. If he got all excited like that, he might be the type to tell everyone in the neighborhood, his family, and people at work that you carry and have firearms at the house.

I prefer to keep my business mine as much as possible. There are a LOT of hysterical people running around out there preaching about "the dangers of guns".

Speaking of which, I almost ran off the road on I-85S near the Spencer exit on the way to the range when I saw that HUGE billboard announcing "Please support the ban on assault weapons" Really? In Davidson County? WTF????????????????

At any rate, you were calm, courteous to guests, and did what needed to be done in the moment... but think that friendship over.
 
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Speaking of which, I almost ran off the road on I-85S near the Spencer exit on the way to the range when I saw that HUGE billboard announcing "Please support the ban on assault weapons" Really? In Davidson County? WTF????????????????

There was an identical billboard for a long time along 421 somewhere beyond Wilkesboro a few years ago. It was a head scratcher for sure.
 
You reacted well, got to save face with the kids and women folk.....but that dude sounds like he sucks, he and I would not be friends.
/\/\/\This/\/\/\

Next time he came over it would be a full size carried OWB, one of them big ole pig stickers you favor and a direct eye contact smile for the ole boy.
 
Do you really want your kids picking up the sort of ideas that sort of family espouse?

I've got one friend who asks me to disarm in his house because his wife is gun phobic and because it's his house I do. I can't imagine ever doing so in my own home because someone else demanded it.
 
I'd like to hear what yall think...

I feel like a sissy for disarming, but I also feel glad that the kids can still be friends...
Yes, you should have told him to GTFO.

It will be a while, but sooner or later you will hear that the neighbors know you have WEAPONS in your house and have decided they do not want their girls playing at your house. Your girls can go to their house, but their girls can't come to yours.

And a bit later you will hear that the neighbors have decided it is better for their girls to not associate with kids who have parents like you.
 
He said, "IS THAT A WEAPON? "

I said, "Huh?"

He yelled, "IS THAT A WEAPON? I DON'T WANT THAT AROUND MY CHILDREN! PUT IT AWAY OR WE ARE LEAVING! "

...I walked into my house and disarmed...

I came back outside and everything went back to normal. We continued talking. He said, "Thank You. "

I said, "You're welcome. By the way, do you and your wife swing?"
 
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