Micro-9mm Speed Dating: or how I learned to stop worrying and love the P365

[commiecuriocollector]

I got one of them expensive and fancy pieces of paper saying I'm a historian. Whatever isn't archived is lost to the ages like tears in rain. It's why we still laugh about Ea-nāṣir's shady copper business nearly 4,000 years later. Plus the best writing comes in the serene silence of the night, accompanied by South American coffee and Swedish tobacco.



The future is now old man. In seriousness though, it's dark half your life and the optic is a boon for accuracy. I can live with an extra 4oz for those advantages. Plus my 442-1 is my go to Walgreens at zero dark thirty in gym shorts and flip-flops carry piece.



Are Jnco jeans back in fashion? Asking for a friend.

Boy howdy, now ain't that the truth! Ole Ea-nāṣir was quite the character!


But Jncos......I think I just found the solution to my problem! I have never been able to justify the purchase of a DEagle cause I never could find a suitable way to conceal it! Where is my brain? If they could carry a 1.75L of Aristocrap back in the day I bet they'd be perfect for carrying around 7+1 of .50 AE today!

Two of em!

W007!

 

[MacEntyre]

-The thesis of the post was that in spite of a terrible company whose business practices sickatates me on a personal level, I learned to accept that chasing a better micro 9mm isn't possible. Additionally, I have been in bed with the P365 for a few years now, so you didn't study your source material. Brevity is the soul of wit, but detailed reports give more information to perspective Siggers. You may turn in a 2,500 word paper, double spaced with 12 font in Times New Roman for extra credit to bring your grade up before Finals. The topic shall be on comedy writers in the pre-Internet era in regards to weaponry. I only challenge you because I believe in you. I'll also include a letter of recommendation to the Board of Memes.

Professor Slimer
Department of Historical Memematics
University of Clowning and Comedy
Risus est divinitas ludi vitae.

Wow! Even the abstract is verbose...

But, perfessor, I like it! You have developed a real talent!

 

[Slimer]

Can you write another 500 words on Sigs business practice? I don’t much like their guns so I haven’t bothered to keep up.

In the interest of brevity because a large-breasted redhead nurse hasn't hooked an IV filled with Colombian coffee into me and the University of Clowning and Comedy is a 100% non-profit... you'll only get a 350 word satire.

Introducing the Sig-Sauer P226 Elite Legion TacOps Spartan Hoplite! Now with 40% more Indian MIM and machining marks! Includes a coupon for -1% off in the Sig Webstore and a cadmium-plated Challenge coin. Pair with the new .277 Fury MCX-SPEAR, the next-generation rifle against the Neo Axis of Evil that wears body armor.... even though the 2nd most powerful military uses elite Chinese-made laptop plates in their armor carriers and the UA/RU war has devolved into M4 vs AK in trench warfare with dive-bomb drones. Be the envy of everyone at the range with your Sig-Sauer Battle Polo made from 100% post-consumer recycled plastic bottles floating in the Pacific ocean that our brave Indian shipping barges picked up in a tactical clean up mission.

We've also partnerd with Oakley for the new Sig-Sauer Oak Leaf Tactical Elite Sunshades. Made from the finest 100% post-consumer recycled Funko Pop toys with polarized BPA lenses, you may scan the range for the most tactical bay to sight-in your new .277 Fury MCX-SPEAR. Sig-Sauer recommends only the best Sig-Sauer ammunition to go with Sig-Sauer firearms. Load it tactically as you fire one round per 5 minutes at 25 yards while you discuss other exciting Sig-Sauer products to other potential buyers Improve your Toyota Tacoma Pre-Runner, covered in Salt-Life and Yeti decals with the new Sig-Sauer Elite decal! We bought a decommissioned Chinese plastics factory, using ancient Chinese methods to channel your inner Sun Tzu at the range. Be the envy of other gun owners as you drive on the highway, not signaling and tail-gating like you are the elite in a tactical mission to Starbucks.

After your Cookie-Crunch Iced Matcha Latte, consider something special for your better half. We at Sig-Sauer have partnered with Always to bring the new Sig-Sauer ROSE Always Prepared Maxi Pads. Formed from 100% post-consumer recycled used bush meat diapers direct from Zimbabwe. The spirit of bush wars, safaris, and wet-work won't leave your loved one wet with these ELITE absorbent maxi pads. Keep your wife safe and guarded against the Regime of Aunt Flo every 28 days. Also available as an Amazon-exclusive subscription product.
-------------------

But I still <3 the P365.

 

[RetiredUSNChief]

-The thesis of the post was that in spite of a terrible company whose business practices sickatates me on a personal level, I learned to accept that chasing a better micro 9mm isn't possible. Additionally, I have been in bed with the P365 for a few years now, so you didn't study your source material. Brevity is the soul of wit, but detailed reports give more information to perspective Siggers. You may turn in a 2,500 word paper, double spaced with 12 font in Times New Roman for extra credit to bring your grade up before Finals. The topic shall be on comedy writers in the pre-Internet era in regards to weaponry. I only challenge you because I believe in you. I'll also include a letter of recommendation to the Board of Memes.

Professor Slimer
Department of Historical Memematics
University of Clowning and Comedy
Risus est divinitas ludi vitae.

Trust me...NOBODY here wants to see me rise to the paltry challenge of a 2,500 word posting here! Pretty sure most people here think I get verbose enough as it is!

I think your 1,642 word OP is quite enough!

😆

 

[commiecuriocollector]

In the interest of brevity because a large-breasted redhead nurse hasn't hooked an IV filled with Colombian coffee into me and the University of Clowning and Comedy is a 100% non-profit... you'll only get a 350 word satire.

Introducing the Sig-Sauer P226 Elite Legion TacOps Spartan Hoplite! Now with 40% more Indian MIM and machining marks! Includes a coupon for -1% off in the Sig Webstore and a cadmium-plated Challenge coin. Pair with the new .277 Fury MCX-SPEAR, the next-generation rifle against the Neo Axis of Evil that wears body armor.... even though the 2nd most powerful military uses elite Chinese-made laptop plates in their armor carriers and the UA/RU war has devolved into M4 vs AK in trench warfare with dive-bomb drones. Be the envy of everyone at the range with your Sig-Sauer Battle Polo made from 100% post-consumer recycled plastic bottles floating in the Pacific ocean that our brave Indian shipping barges picked up in a tactical clean up mission.

We've also partnerd with Oakley for the new Sig-Sauer Oak Leaf Tactical Elite Sunshades. Made from the finest 100% post-consumer recycled Funko Pop toys with polarized BPA lenses, you may scan the range for the most tactical bay to sight-in your new .277 Fury MCX-SPEAR. Sig-Sauer recommends only the best Sig-Sauer ammunition to go with Sig-Sauer firearms. Load it tactically as you fire one round per 5 minutes at 25 yards while you discuss other exciting Sig-Sauer products to other potential buyers Improve your Toyota Tacoma Pre-Runner, covered in Salt-Life and Yeti decals with the new Sig-Sauer Elite decal! We bought a decommissioned Chinese plastics factory, using ancient Chinese methods to channel your inner Sun Tzu at the range. Be the envy of other gun owners as you drive on the highway, not signaling and tail-gating like you are the elite in a tactical mission to Starbucks.

After your Cookie-Crunch Iced Matcha Latte, consider something special for your better half. We at Sig-Sauer have partnered with Always to bring the new Sig-Sauer ROSE Always Prepared Maxi Pads. Formed from 100% post-consumer recycled used bush meat diapers direct from Zimbabwe. The spirit of bush wars, safaris, and wet-work won't leave your loved one wet with these ELITE absorbent maxi pads. Keep your wife safe and guarded against the Regime of Aunt Flo every 28 days. Also available as an Amazon-exclusive subscription product.
-------------------

But I still <3 the P365.

The Neo Axis of Evil, Aunt Flo.

If the other Axis of Evil, the anti-gunners, could ever come up with a critique of the industry half as poignant as that of Sig (which I really think is applicable across the board) I'd be half tempted to concede their arguments had validity. Thankfully they haven't and are unlikely to. As long as Slimer stays put.

The most stinging critiques can only come from the inside.