Take the cosecant of the imaginary number representing moral choice in a vacuum at any one point in time, tied to the price of sugar. Square that by the number of times CNN mentioned 'panic' in the previous 24 hours, divided by the second derivative of the euclidean vector of the current sunspot activity.
Factor in a 20% retardation factor, for glock fanboys, and if Pisces or Virgo is rising.
Or, take any gun website you fine a new Glock 19 listed, and subtract 20-25%, your choice.
