Wife Problems....Serious

BatteryOaksBilly

BatteryOaksBilly

A SHOOTER
Benefactor
Life Member
Supporting Member
Joined
Jan 1, 2018
Messages
18,582
Location
Conway, S.C.
Rating - 100%
17   0   0
Many years ago when I was married to another fair maiden, we were out for supper with another couple we spent time with.
About half way through supper a young lady in her 20s walked by the table, leaned over and Kissed me right square on the mouth. She said.."I'll see you tomorrow, same time, same place."
My wife said .."Just who in THE Hell was that?"
I said..."Wellll that was my girl friend."
Wife said.."Well I'll Not be treated this way. I want a divorce!"
I said.."Well if nothing else will do you can leave tomorrow. Just remember the Pre Nup is iron clad. You will leave without your new Mercedes, your jewelry, your furs and all the designer clothes, bags and shoes. You will leave with a check for $25,000 and Nothing else."
Before she could even answer another Beautiful young girl came up to the table and kissed my friend across the table and said, "Tomorrow, same time same place".
My wife said..."Welll who in The Hell was That????"
I said ..."Why that was His girl friend".
My wife paused, pursed her lips and said.."PFTTTTT, she's not Near as pretty as Ours!!"
 
Last edited:
In a small town in Kentucky, back before cars were common, the faithful got around largely by bicycle. One day Eli went to the pastor and told him his bicycle had been stolen. Eli was upset and wanted the pastor’s help in finding the culprit.

The Pastor agreed to preach a fire and brimstone sermon on Sunday, emphasizing, among other things, the evil of theft, with hope that the thief would be overcome with guilt and return Eli’s bicycle. The pastor delivered the sermon.

The next day he encountered Eli and asked him if he had seen anything of the thief. Eli said, “No, but when you preached about not coveting another man’s wife, I remembered where I left my bicycle!”
 
In late 1988, I began working for an Eye-talian company. In the beginning, I spent many months over there in order to become acclimated. Eventually, my wife came for a visit and I was excited to take her to the restaurant where I’d been eating two meals a day for months.

We sat down and the owner came over. In my crude Eye-talian, I explained, “Raffaele, this is my wife Nancy”. He looked at her, then at me and, in English that was all too understandable, said, “But your wife is a blond”.

It was funny only to him. :mad:
 
Last edited:
Jeppo said:
In late 1988, I began working for an Eye-talian company. In the beginning, I spent many months over there in order to become acclimated.
Click to expand...
Why haven't you become acclimated here?


I knew an old lawyer who was married only once, but every time he introduced his wife, he said, "Have you met my present wife, Sarah?"
 
Last edited:
I told my wife a long time ago, 'If you won't do it I'll find somebody else who will'. And I did: In the early afternoon on the first Tuesday of every month I have a standing appointment with an attractive young lady. She charges a reasonable rate and I always leave satisfied.

I'm happy, the wife is happy, and she probably couldn't cut my hair that good anyhow so it all works out in the end.
 
Last edited:
Eating lunch with a coworker yesterday, he asked me “you know what a Freudian slip is”? I said yeah, isn’t that when you mean to say one thing, but end up saying what you’re really thinking instead?
He says yeah. This morning when I was getting ready for work, my wife yelled upstairs “do you want orange juice or coffee with your breakfast?”.

I yelled back in response “BITCH YOU RUINED MY LIFE!!!!”.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom